that other guy’s thoughts

ahhhh..yeah. You know what I’m talkin’ bout.

no?…anybody?…fine, I’ll explain

In your general office environment, all the worker bees sit in nice comfy padded chairs, staring blankly into their computer screens. That is until something goes wrong with the computer. Then the I.T. guy has to come in and try to fix whatever the worker bee broke.

Yes, the WINNT folder is important. No, randomly deleting files won’t make your computer better.

Invariably, the I.T. guy won’t be able to guide the mindless automaton through the steeps needed to stave off the impending blue screen of death, so He’ll have to sit down at the computer and do it himself.

And there comes the rub. The mindless automaton may not be able to accomplish anything useful to the rest of the world, but like all mammals, he is a living heat source. So that nice comfy padded chair of his has been baking at 98.6 degrees under his ever-widening rump. And now the I.T. guy has to sit in that festering wad of cushion and fabric and do his ward off the computer gremlins of this world.

And the worst part? The I.T. guy knows it’s coming, and has done everything in his power to stop it. The moronic peon, realizing what he’s left behind in the inner folds of that gluteus-maximus domicile when he stands up and catch the cool 72 degree rush of ambient air, becomes grossly self-aware.

All this of course leads to the bumbling idiot to blather on because his nerves are racking his brain which leaves him even more useless than before and he’s now hindering the I.T. guy making him sit even longer in that luke-warm sponge trying not to think about the odors now seeping into the seat of his pants.

welcome to my life: where pee in the pool is the least of your problems

As offical town cryer for TOG (and Pres, VP, Sec. of Paper Cuts..etc) let it by known that the following statements have henceforth been stated.

TOG is now official a participator in the Million Dollar Football Pool. Therefore MDFP shall be the offical sport of TOG until it’s conclusion at the end of the NFL season.

In the spirit of the aforementioned game, a link to miniluv, brain child of fellow MDFP participate Court, shall be located in the links section of the mockup

In the spirit of the aforementioned reference, the mockup will soon no longer be the mockup. It shall soon simply be the front page. Therefore this is the last chance for all citizens and casual readers alike to suggest modifications to the Secretary of Webmastery.

So mote it be!

In case anybody was wondering what I’ve been doing the 6 days since school started. Here’s your anwser. And yes, it was due the second day of class.

But that my friends, isn’t even the real nut of it. The real rub comes at me specifically (like all real rubs do). Because of the university’s enrollment snafu, I missed all of my classes on Thursday, including 550. So I spent 15 hours doing homework for a class I had never step foot in.

Welcome to your junior year in Aerospace Engineering. Don’t drop the soap.

Since I don’t have anything remotely interesting to say right now, I’ll just point out that MTV has done a remake of Spider-Man It’s pretty entertaining as far a TV shows go, and really quite an impressive technical jump. It’s the first good quality CG (computer generated) series. The chips & salsa required to animate graphics like that are getting better and cheaper, so good stuff is sure to follow.

Well, today was supposed to be my first day of classes, starting at 8:00 a.m. But the powers that be decided that they wouldn’t allow my seamless transition from summer time work to fall term school. So I was magically dropped from all my classes yesterday, unbeknownst to me. So when I finally found out at 10:30 last night through e-mail (DTFU: level 1 inductee) There was nothing I could do about it. Thus instead of going to all my classes today, starting the semester off right, I was running all over campus trying to figure out what the hell they did to screw me over.

After hours of line standing, wrong window meet, I’m not the person to talk to greeting, I still don’t know why I was dis-enrolled. And apparently neither does anybody else on this god-forsaken campus.

So here I go again braving the waters of this momument to inefficiency they call a university, in a vain attempt to pursue some semblance of respect in the form of an overpriced piece of paper.

mmm…bureaucracy

MOST UPDATEDLYNESS UPDATE: Victory is mine…sort of. I explain in depth later but suffice to say, I finally got it all staightened out and I’ve be re-enrolled in my classes, except for circuits because it’s full. But soon even that will be remedied…now where did I put that vile of strychnine?

In addition to my work over at my mockup I’ve also decided to add a permanent essay section. It will have permanent links to various essays I’ve written, as well as those that I find interesting written by others. Until then, sink you eyes on this beauty I wrote this spring. It’s basically the history of political thought since the beginning of time. There is a pretty light hearted tone throughout so even if you don’t like the nitty gritty of ideologies, it shouldn’t be too hard to enjoy. So wrap your brains around it and let me know what you think, even if it’s unmentionably offensive.

n3v3r 83f0re 1n +3h h15t0ry 0PH TOG h4V3 1 P0$T3d 3n+1RELy 1n l33t. N0 lon93r $h@ll th1$ tr4vi$+y 49a1n$+ @ll tg1n9$ n3rd $+and unch4llen93d. The g4un+l3t h45 833n thr0wn d0wn cl3ar1n9 th3 w4y ph0r M3 to 4cc3pt my r19htphull 1nh3r1+@nc3 oph +he 34r+h!

F4-5h1zzle My N1zzl3!

In my ongoing effort to expand my vocabulary of made up words, and make milk come out of your nose, I’ve decide to incorporate the word “gigli” into my language. The only question that remains is what part of speech should it be? Let go over the candidates.

Gigli noun 1.a clossal failure when compared to any and all reasonable expections. Best used in metaphors or similes.
ex. She pulled a Gigli by totally her car before leaving the dealer’s lot.

Gigli verb 1.the act of statching defeat from the claws of victory.
ex. He totally giglied his marriage to that super model by sleeping with the one legged stipper at his bachelor party.

Gigli adj 1.wholly unfunctional 2. painful to experience.
ex. Watching Jim get kicked in the junk was a gigli experience for all the men present.

[publishers warning: non-original explectives ahead, hide the kids]

You know what I’m gonna do? I’m gonna get myself a 1967 Cadillac El Dorado convertible, hot pink with whaleskin hub caps and all leather cow interior and big brown baby seal eyes for headlights, yeah! And I’m gonna drive around in that baby at 115 miles per hour getting one mile per gallon, sucking down quarter pounder cheese burgers from McDonald’s in the old-fashioned non-biodegradable styrofoam containers and when I’m done sucking down those grease ball burgers, I’m gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag and then I’m gonna toss the styrofoam container right out the side and there ain’t a God damned thing anybody can do about it. You know why? Because we got the bombs, that’s why.

Two words. Nuclear fucking weapons, okay?! Russia, Germany, Romania - they can have all the Democracy they want. They can have a big democracy cake-walk right through the middle of Tiananmen square and it won’t make a lick of difference because we’ve got the bombs, okay?! John Wayne’s not dead - he’s frozen. And as soon as we find the cure for cancer we’re gonna thaw out the Duke and he’s gonna be pretty pissed off. You know why? Have you ever taken a cold shower? Well multiple that by 15-million times, that’s how pissed off the Duke’s gonna be.

-Denis Leary

Jeans. Where the crap does that word come from? It’s not an obvious pop culture contraction, and it’s not the name of any particular company. So what’s the deal?

Here’s the deal, courtesy of Design Boom:

the word jeans comes from a kind of material that was made in europe.
the material, called jean, was named after sailors from genoa in italy,
because they wore clothes made from it