that other guy’s thoughts

Because apparently 3 rounds of layoffs isn’t enough, we need to keep stretching this baby out…again.

We got another wonderful “Workforce Planning Update” by email today. And true to form, this one served no purpose other than to freak everybody out. It wasn’t a ‘you’re fired.’ email, or a ‘you’re gonna be fired’ email, or even a ’some of you will be fired.’ email.

It was a ‘At some unknown date in the future, an unknown number of you will get fired at an unknown time. Also, we’re probably gonna temporarily furlough a different unknown number of you, but we don’t really know when we’ll get around to telling you for sure.’ email. That’s some A+ corporate communications fellas, you earned your bonuses this year.

Personally, if I’m gonna get canned, I’d rather it be as soon as possible, so I mentally check out and start looking for another job. Under normal economic circumstances, I’m eminently employable, but nowadays, it would probably take a few months. You know, in these economic times.

Nothing encourages free-thinking, can-do, American ingenuity like hanging the swords of Damocles above your employees’ heads for 6 solid months.

Oops, is that too obscure a reference? How about “Chinese Water Enhanced Interrogation Techniques Torture” or “Death by a thousand paper cuts?”

I managed to survive a 3rd round of layoffs. However, for reasons passing my understanding, I’ve been temporarily traded to Field Service Engineering (for a 240 gallons of Jet-A, 3 boxes of graph paper, and a-player-to-be-named-later, I think). I don’t know if the new job will be better or worse, I don’t even know what my day-to-day responsibilities will be. What I do know is that it’s a budget/manpower thing, and completely out of my control. Right now, I’m choosing not to worry too much about the hows and whys of the source of my paycheck, and more about making sure I get one every 2 weeks.

It’s tough to see so many colleagues lose their jobs because of things 100% out of their control. But as long as the economy is in the crapper, and bashing business jets is the populist fad du jour, even making the best airplanes in the world won’t help.

That leaves us in the same place we’ve always been; attempting to follow TOG’s 2 immutable life rules:

1. Don’t die.
2. Don’t be dumb.

Everything else is just gravy. You know…in these economic times.

I’ve got friend getting engaged, friends getting married, and friends getting (re)pregnant. So this will probably get lost in the shuffle, but starting today, I’ve transfered to the Stress engineering group at Cessna. I’ll go into more detail later, but for now let me preemptively answer your FAQs.

1. Yes, I now work normal day-shift hours.
2. No, I’m not getting paid any more, this was a lateral transfer.
3. Yes, I’m going to like my new job, that’s why I requested it.

You may now go about your previously scheduled business.

For something like the 8th consecutive weekday, I got home after 12:30 tonight. Which means I won’t get to sleep until 1:30 or 2. Which means I won’t get up until 10:00. Which means by the time I get around to mowing my lawn, it will be 92 degrees outside with 759% humidity.

After I’ve sweated out the last drop of moisture from my body, finally come inside, showered, ate some lunch, and packed my dinner, I will have approximately 1 hour of free time before I have to start getting ready for another day of work.

And yet, when I show up to work, 15 minutes early, I will invariably cross paths in the parking lot with my 1st-shift counterparts, who are leaving 45 minutes early after a strenuous 7.5 hour day of being 40% less productive than me.

Seriously, I’m getting quite tired of this crap.

I just got home, 2 hours late.

Why you ask?

Because what takes me 3 minutes to do in my head, takes me 15 minutes to explain to someone else, who will promptly forget and ask again tomorrow.

So instead of just doing what I do. I’ll say what I’m going to do, explain why I’m going to do, demonstrate while I do it, summarize what I’ve done, explain why I’ve done it, and recap what we all do with a wide-angle lens.

This is now my life for the next 2 months, huzzah!

We’ve got a new guy starting on 2nd shift this week, and of course, I’m training him. He’s a new graduate from KU, but he’s originally from Venezuela and spent 5 years in college. So I put it at about 6:5 that I’ll be younger than my newbie…again. On top of that, we’re getting another new guy in July, and I know that he’s older than me.

This all leads to the distinct and odd possibility that since I was hired, we will have had 5 new college grads enter the group, and every single one will be older than me. Is that cool or just sad?

Update 6/14: Yep, 9 months older than me. I’m the baby for the forseeable future.

I got some flack for complaining about my promotion a couple weeks ago. So lest you all think I’m a too much of a chronic complainer, I give you this little nugget of personal neurosis.

About once a month, ever since I started working 2 years ago, I’m struck by how awesomely unfair my life is, in my favor. I’ll look at my paycheck and think, “Holy Crap, they’re paying me how much?” I get paid handsomely for a job I would likely do for minimum wage. Objectively, yes, If Cessna only paid me $5.15 / hour, I would go someplace else. However, if engineering jobs, on the whole, only paid minimum wage, I’d still do it. That’s how much I enjoy what I do.

It’s a gift really. I have been blessed with a passion and talent that have allowed me to work in a field in which the work is diverse, in demand, and well-compensated. Obviously, a lot hard work went into getting this far, as seen by my many years of complaining about school, but hard work isn’t always enough to live the dream. Having a passion for airplanes, and a logical mind to understand them, that is a gift for which I really should be grateful.

Promotion.

Well, not a real promotion. I do the exact same job as before; I just get more money and a marginally better title. It’s not a promotion for doing my job well. It’s a promotion because I’ve worked here for 2 years, and at that point it becomes an insult to call your employees “associate engineers.” So you drop the “associate” and throw them a bit more scratch.

Of course the real insulting thing is working next to an “Engineering Specialist” who makes twice what I do for doing the exact same job at a less productive rate. Experience surely makes him valuable, probably more valuable than me, but twice as valuable? No freaking way.

But I suppose that is the inherent irony of the modern workplace. It’s impossible to be totally fair. When you get a raise one day, it becomes clear that the work you did the day before was compensated less that what you’ll do today, even though the quality is identical. Either you were unfairly underpaid yesterday or you’re being unfairly overpaid today. That’s the nature of the beast.

Maybe it’s an impossible ideal so we just do the best we can. Maybe the whole concept of “fairness” has no place in business. Maybe I’m just picking a fight because with Mo’ Money comes Mo’ Problems.

When I was looking for a job straight out of college 2 years ago, I proceeded with a Ulysses S. Grant battle plan. throw 100,000 troops into every battle, and eventually you’ll win. So I applied to every entry-level engineering position in the aerospace business, at least 3 times. I sent out paper copies and e-mail attachments of my resume to everybody I ever met at any company that had anything to do with aircraft. I had 2 or 3 profiles on Monster.com, Careerbuilder.com, Hotjobs.com, and every other job search website in existence. I was willing to go anywhere and do anything, I would have accepted a job for 75% of the going rate. My over-reaching strategy could be summed up in 2 words, “Saturation” and “Desparation.” So what was the fruit of my massive labor?

1 single offer. But one is all you need, and this one worked out swimmingly.

But now, two years later, without so much as a single application, I get called up and asked to interview for a job at another company. An odd occurrence for sure, but not enough to warrant an entire post on it’s peculiarity.

A 2nd request for a different job halfway across the country? Now that is post-worthy. But that’s where I find myself after being contacted by a head-hunter looking for a structural analysis engineer for some contract work out of El Segundo, California.

The Times, They are a-Change’n!

I recently got an unsolicited request to interview for a new job. The job is identical to what I do now but at a different company, so I have no intention of taking it. I don’t what to give up all my 401(k) match, 2 years seniority, and 5 minute commute to do a job I’m already over-educated for and would pose no real challenge.

I am however, curious as to how much somebody else is willing to pay me.

Is it ethical to go through the interview process, essentially wasting others time, just to satisfy my curiosity? I don’t think so, but I’d like to hear more opinions.